I woke up this morning as the sun was rising from a dream that left me wishing there were less stigma surrounding mental illness.

In the dream, I was chatting with a stranger who asked how I was and of whom I inquired the same. He told me he was fine, and I said the same. But then, he said, something along the lines of that is what we are supposed to say when someone asks how we are doing. We are supposed to tell people we are fine, even when we are not. But why is that? What would happen if we who live with mental illness, substance use disorder, eating disorders or trauma were to tell people what we really are feeling? More likely than not, we would be met with surprised looks.

We are taught at a young age not to share our true feelings with others lest we somehow offend them. We are taught at a young age not to share our true feelings because most people do not know what to do with others’ feelings. So, we say we are fine, that everything is good. In my world of mental health, keeping silent about your true feelings is what helps perpetuate stigma.

I truly believe that if we start sharing our real feelings and our stories about our lives with mental illness and substance use and eating disorders and trauma, there will be less stigma surrounding these sicknesses. If more people could come to the understanding that depression, anxiety, substance use, eating disorders and trauma are illnesses that can be treated and managed like any other kind of illness, perhaps there would be less stigma surrounding them. If more people could understand that mental illnesses are treatable medical condition, perhaps more people would feel free to seek treatment and enter into recovery.

How do we go about sharing our stories? By being honest about our feelings. If someone who cares about you asks how you are doing, tell him the truth. Hopefully, that person will take a minute to listen to how you really are doing and offer an encouraging word or two. That can help open up a conversation about mental illness, one where you can provide information about conditions that affect some one in five people. The more we who live with mental illness, substance use, eating disorders and trauma can educate those who are not afflicted, the closer we come to ending stigma.

Naturally, my dream ended before that stranger and I could share what we both really were feeling. My hope upon waking was, though, that we both shared our true feelings and entered into a conversation about them. Wishful thinking? Perhaps, but I remain hopeful and confident that the more we share our true feelings and stories, the weaker stigma becomes. What can you to today to help end the stigma surrounding mental illness? Can you share your story? Can you tell someone who cares about you how you really are feeling?