We who live with mental illness have a super power not everyone possesses: empathy. We have been there, done that. We know what it feels like to have been to rock bottom and to have clawed our way back … sometimes repeatedly.

But we cannot just exercise empathy for others who also are living with mental illness; we must practice self-empathy. We are born to be perfectly imperfect beings. We never were meant to be perfect. There are some who believe we should strive only for progress, not perfection and to some extent that is true. The more we try to be perfect, the more we find ourselves falling short of that lofty goal. Accept yourself for the wonderfully, beautifully made person that you are. Show yourself some empathy and in so doing, it will be easier to show empathy for others who also are struggling with mental illness.

Self-empathy, also known as self-compassion, can be difficult to practice, indeed. It can be difficult to forgive ourselves certain transgressions or mistakes. But we all make mistakes; that is how we learn. I argue that we should make bigger mistakes so we can learn and grow from them. Mistakes are proof that you are trying, so try harder, make bigger mistakes. But once you learn from your mistake, try not to make that mistake again. For once you do, that mistake becomes a choice and as we have talked about before, life is a series of choices.

If you want to live a better, healthier life, you have to make better choices. It can be difficult to not beat yourself up for making a poor choice, but if you do, show yourself some empathy and forgive yourself. We cannot seek forgiveness from others until we first forgive ourselves.

This holiday season be thankful for the mistakes you have made and show yourself some empathy for having in the past made poor choices. It is from those poor choices and mistakes that we can grow into better, stronger beings. Be thankful for the chance to become the person you always were meant to be.