Today in the United States, many of us are celebrating the country’s independence. This makes me think about that word, “independence,” and what it means. Of course, it means many different things to many different people.

According to Merriam-Webster, the word independent means: not subject to control by others. In my world of mental health and substance use disorders, being independent could mean being free of undue influence of others, or being free of a substance or drug of choice. In either case, people could consider how they would like to celebrate their independence this 4th of July.

Some people may find it difficult to celebrate their independence today, particularly if they are in abusive or controlling relationships, or if they are struggling with substance use disorders. Others may find it difficult to celebrate their independence if they find they are living with mobility concerns. Still others may find that they are unable to celebrate their independence if they are facing housing issues, poverty or incarceration.

For others, though, today might be a good day to consider how you might assert your independence. That may mean considering what the word “independence” means to you. Could it mean giving yourself permission to set and enforce healthy boundaries, particularly in relationships that have become toxic? Could it mean summoning the strength to end a relationship that no longer serves you, is unhealthy, or brings you joy? Could it mean distancing yourself from people or places that leave you feeling trapped, insecure or used? Could it mean making the call to enter treatment for substance use?

Perhaps on this Independence Day, celebrating or advocating for your independence means you celebrate you and all the healthy ways you take care of yourself. Perhaps on this Independence Day, you engage in healthy self-care and put your needs, wants, hopes and desires at the forefront. Perhaps on this Independence Day, you celebrate all you are and all your potential and give yourself permission to take that next step you’ve been thinking about for so long in your career, family life, or relationships.

When we give ourselves permission to think about what that word “independence” means to us, we really can think about how we want to assert and celebrate our independence. Maybe that means setting ourselves free from the shackles of a controlling other or calling for help to escape an abusive relationship. Maybe that means setting a boundary in a toxic relationship, be that with a coworker, family member, or friend.

We have the right to claim our independence in a way that is respectful of others yet also ensures that our needs are met. We have the right to claim our independence in a way that leaves both ourselves and others with dignity. We have the right to claim our independence from those who leave us feeling oppressed, less than, or used.

Sometimes in life, we have to take care of our own needs. Sometimes in life, we have to advocate for ourselves. How can you claim your independence today? What would it mean for you to assert your independence today? Can you celebrate your independence today?

~ Karri Christiansen, MSW, LSW, CADC, CCTP